You’ve had to listen to enough of him. Now make sure he hears a little bit of you. Direct as much rage as humanly possible at the child star in the comment field below.


3 Responses to “Directed Rage, Week 3: The Child Star”

  1. jdschaefer Says:

    Hey! What’s up Bieber?

    Sorry about that indoor game last night–you and your homeboys really gave us a run for our money. For the first 5 minutes. Pride still hurting from what happened after that? Remember how we scored not 3, 4, 5, but 8 goals against your hapless defence? And the whole time you whined about how ’35 year old men’ shouldn’t feel good about beating up on 18 year olds. Well, I’ll admit, it does feel pretty good. Maybe it’s just me, or perhaps it was seeing you all wearing underarmor as the team uniform, but somewhere between the starting whistle and the ass-kicking we gave you I began to feel pretty good. It’s ok, Justin Bieber, I’ll get over it, at least until the next time we play eachother. You see, it’s only a winning situation for me. If you beat a team of ’35 year old men,’ you’ve done nothing but what was expected. But when we win, we’ve done something quite remarkable: We’ve beaten a team of younger, more athletic, and what should be better players but aren’t–and that feels pretty good. Especially when I hear your nasally voices complain that we should be in a better division. Well, Justin Bieber, maybe you should be in a lower division. No hard feelings, Justin Bieber, I think we can both be adults here. But just to let you know, I’m 35, and I banged your mom last night. I can do that, because I’m an adult and so is she. See you next time.

    Team ‘Sleeve of Wizard’

  2. jdschaefer Says:

    I’m only going to tell you one time.

  3. […] And speaking of not learning anything, you’ve got your first assignment. It’s a pretty traditional first-day-of-school set of gimme points, the ritualistic covering of the textbook. It’s too bad your motivation to actually do it is still lounging by the pool sipping Kool Aid and listening to Justin Bieber. […]

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